The first is a device that signals Descarte's evil genius.  At a simple click of a webpage link, Descartes' genius (he's really not as evil as everyone says) will devote his attentions to deceiving you!  This is completely painless:  No electrodes connected to your synapses!  No putting on an experience inducer!  No brain removal or messy vat nutrient!  Simply click the link below.  There will be a brief pause.  It will appear that this web page will reload and presto!  It will seem to you that you are still sitting in front of a computer but in fact you will have been transported to your own comfortable bed.  FYI:  Once the Genius starts to work, your experience will be JUST as it presently is.  So, there will be no way of telling that the Genius is at work and NO WAY TO TELL HIM TO STOP.   Fortunately, negotiations with the Genius, have permitted us to guarantee--at no additional charge--that the Genius will leave you alone and restore you to the world just as it seemed to you after one hour of delusion.  This procedure is painless and completely unnoticable.
 
 

The second is just the device if your are seeking revenge.  You can instantly and painlessly (and we do mean painlessly) turn your worst enemy into a ZOMBIE.  With a click of the button below, all of your worst enemy's consciousness and all the qualitative aspects of his or her mental states will be wiped out, leaving a functionally equivalent zombie.  The best part:  NO ONE WILL EVER KNOW WHAT YOU'VE DONE.  Your enemy will continue to behave just as he or she has always behaved but will no longer consciously experience any of the pleasures of life.
 
 

Stay tuned to this page for information on new and exciting inventions from the conceptual engineers from NCSU's Department of Philosophy and Religion!