Witchtrap

Well, Witchtrap is another winner....not even Linnea Quigley can save the bad acting in this movie! Ok, some guy dies and leaves a house to his nephew I believe it was, whose last name is Laughter...slaughter withough the S!

So, anyway, some magician goes to the house for some reason and ends up falling out os a second story window. So, the guy who owns the place decides to make it into a bed and breakfast and sends a security team, psychic, and camera crew to prove the place is haunted because apparently everyone in America likes to stay at haunted places!

So, they get there and set up all their stuff. The main psychic lady, Agnes, is one of those people who has no clue how to act, and she pronounces every single word perfectly and basically just makes you sick. Her husband, Felix, is a weenie, but he's a guy that the ghost can talk through. Theres also another lady who the ghosts can supposedly come in to...she just walks around gettting possessed or something by the ghost. Linnea Quigley is the video person, and she gets killed almost as soon as she gets naked. The security team is ridiculous. The boss of security, Mr. Murphy, lets his two men just cuss him out and call him all sorts of names without doing anything about it. One of the security guys, Levi, likes Linnea Quigley (Ginger), but he gets run over by his own car a few minutes after Linnea Quigley gets in the shower. The other guy...Mr. Vicente...what an idiot! He makes all sorts of stupid jokes, and he's really cocky.

Ok, so that puts us up to where they're in the house and they're waiting for something to happen...and stuff always happens when they're not watching the cameras, but that's beside the point. Oh, there's also a groundskeeper who gets blamed for all the deaths even though there's no way he could have done it.

Ok, so now it's night time and the head of security gets some kind of steel ball through his head...so now there's only one security guy, the husband and wife team, and the medium...who is constantly gyrating on the bed while being possessed or something...I think the ghost is supposed to be going through her.

Ok, so now the groundskeeper, Elwin, shows up in the basement, and he and Mr. Vicente get into a fight and throw and take punches that from the sound of them no human body could possibly withstand! Elwin finally runs off at the end of the fight. So anyway, now they finally decide maybe it's the ghost that killed everyone and they decide to leave. But, when Vicente goes out to the van, Elwin is out there. He must have a clip that hold about 100 shots, because he blows up the van and shoots Felix who has come out to see what's going on. He's ok, but he's out of action.

Anyway, the real reason why this chick decided to come here is because she has made some stupid ghostbusters thing that sucks energy into it. The idea is to let the ghost talk through Felix, and when it tries to go into Whitney the medium, it will be sucked in. There's also another way to kill the ghost...they can find his missing heart and reunite it with the remains...that will lay him to rest for some reason.

Ok, so now Whitney has run off because everyone's in danger since the ghost can come through her...so she goes to the cemetery of course! The discover that the heart is in the basement, and now they just have to find the urn that the ghost took...so they get the ghost to come back into Felix, and the psychic lady tells him the whole story. So, instead of telling where the urn is, the ghost decides to blow Felix's head up...what a stupid psychic! I don't wanna call her hotline!

Ok, so now we're down to Vicente, Whitney, and Agnes..and Elwin's still on the loose somewhere too. So Whitney's going to leave, but Elwin comes up to the car as she's about to leave and Vicente has to make stupid jokes while he kills him! Whitney says he was possessed, and she knows that type of thing, so maybe he was...anyway, she leaves...she drives all the way to the Sherriff's station but it turns out to be an illusion, and she ends up back at the house!

So Vicente gets knocked down and these hands start coming out of the wall. Then an axe flies through the air and kills Agnes! As its about to kill Vicente, he picks up the ghostbusters thing and sucks the ghost in it! Whitney says she can feel him in the machine and that he's going to get out. So, they need to go find his ashes. So, they think about it, and decide his ashes MUST be in the chapel upstairs...so they take off up there with the heart.

Meanwhile, the ghost escapes from the box or whatever you call it. When they get to the top of the house, the ashes aren't there, and the ghost goes into Whitney. So, anyway, the ashes are up there, because as Whitney, the ghost opens up a door and gets them...then he or she or whatever drinks them and turns into the dead Mr. Laughter!

So now he just needs to kill Vicente, but he says..."You can't kill me...I'm immortal! I have no heart!" And this gives Vicente the idea to shoot the box with Laughter's heart in it. So he does, and then throws it out the window...and the ghost dies. What an idiot...he should have just shut up, killed Vicente, and sealed his heart back up in the wall! Oh well, that's that...it's just too bad Vicente didn't die...everyone hated him!

Anyway, after the ghost dies, Whitney is underneath his skull! Really weird...I think she should have been dead...that had to break some kind of ghost rule didn't it?

There's weird sound effects in this movie...they always seem to have to add something like birds chirping no matter what's going on. And no matter what's going on in the house, they play that stupid ghostbusters machine throbbing noise.

Another weird thing about this movie is that almost every shot is a 1-shot. When two people are talking, hardly ever are they shown together...always one at a time. It's like they didn't know their lines or something and had to do them one at a time.

Classic B! But you'll have that Vicente guy.