Skeeter

Ok, this movie has some problems. First of all, it's rated R for no apparent reason. There's this chick who you want to get naked through the whole movie...and I think she does, but it's so dark you can't see anything, so that sucks! Also, half the movie is about her and this guy trying to hook up, but they're too stupid to do it until 3/4 of the way through!

Anyway, the plot's pretty cool. This guy Drake, who should have been killed but somehow escapes, wants to build up the town. So, I assume they started breeding these huge mosquitos, maybe not, I don't know. You suspect it, but you can't prove it. There's a guy coming in to test the water also, because he thinks the water is contaminated because so many people and animals are dying. But, is it the water, the mosquitos, or the mosquitoes contaminating the water that's killing people? Oh, well, anyway, the sheriff is like 60 years old, but he's always doing these young women, so I guess he's a stud. He's actually in cahoots with Drake, and wants the town to be built up. So, he tries to run all the farmers off the land while doing the women, but a skeeter kills him off too!

There's not much else to say. The first hour is kinda boring. Not too much happens. Cows and people die, nobody knows why. Then, a girl sees her father get killed by the mosquitoes, and she doesn't speak anymore after that, so she's no help. Then, there's this psycho guy who you think is behind the whole thing, because he's got a pet mosquito in his house. He keeps it alive by letting it suck some of his blood. But, then you never see him anymore either, so I'm not sure why he's there. He also tells the guy testing the water that he has a museum, but you never see it, so who cares?

Ok, then there's the funniest part of the movie. This guy comes to town driving like a maniac. He's screaming and spinnning out, and finally he stops. He goes back and beats on the trunk, then opens it. He's got some chick in there. He was punishing her for cheating on him. When he opens the trunk, she grabs his balls, and he falls down. Then he gets up and they start to kiss. He has to go to the bathroom, so he pushes her back into the trunk before he goes. Anyway, he gets killed by a mosquito, she kicks the trunk open, doesn't get naked, and drives away. And that's the end of her.

Ok, now for the story, which happens at the end. The girl takes the water testing guy around to show him different parts of the town where he might find some contamination. They end up at a mine, and it turns out that the skeeters are breeding in there. So, while they're in there, the sheriff comes in to kill them. You're not sure if he knows about the mosquitoes or if he's just upset that they're interfering. Anyway, a skeeter gets him and he dies. The girl and the water guy run out, but the dumb girl falls in a hole. So, the guy has to leave her there, and he goes back to get the deputy. The deputy is mad at him for not dying and saving the girl. So, the deputy tells him to get on the phone and get somebody down there...and that's the last you see of him.

Ok, so the two deputies go to the mine. On the way, the sheriff miraculously makes it out of the mine so he can get hit by the truck they are driving and die when they go over to him. Anyway, they ran off the road at about 4 miles an hour after slamming on the brakes. The deputy bangs his head on the wheel, and the other guy hurts his leg really bad. I guess they weren't wearing seatbelts or something, because it wasn't even a wreck! Ok, so the main deputy guy takes his flame thrower and goes to the mine. The other guy's hobbling along and keeps saying "I'm coming Boone" for pretty much the rest of the movie. The main deputy, Boone, gets into the mine and gets the girl out of the hole. He fries a bunch of skeeters, gets bit by a bunch of them, and then gives the girl the flame thrower. By now, the other deputy has made it to the mine, and Boone tells him to get the girl out of there. By now, also, something is going to explode, so they all have to leave. So then there's a jump cut to them outside, and the mine blows up. The girl and the other deputy get into a truck to get out of town, but Boone says he's going to stay for a couple of days because he's an idiot and then the movie ends.

Don't watch the whole movie! Fast forward to where they're having sex and watch it from there. You haven't missed anything, I promise!